and so the fun begins

school has begun and i'm being a really bad student by not studying and cutting corners...BUT i'm having fun and i'm gonna make sure i keep having fun!

the thing about partying is that it makes weekends better but weekdays worse. now i find myself listening to "Dynamite" mid-week and wishing i weren't so depressed.

sigh.

how to strike a balance? OR AM I TOO YOUNG FOR BALANCE, WOO!

crazy days

oh hello there, i love your dress...cl at the hospital getting stitches.

life has been pretty intense of late...so stressful and so tiring. i really feel like i'm dreaming, and whenever i wake up from a nap i wonder for a moment if its over! haha. the song that best captures how i feel right now: RY CUMING - ALWAYS REMEMBER ME. i actually bought his album on itunes...WOAH. but thats how i feel...kinda floaty, semi-conscious, not happy, not sad, just passing time, wishing futile wishes about times past.

this morning when i woke up i found myself thinking of all the ways in which i could've died yesterday and hence not have to deal with today.

i have to stop myself from thinking those thoughts, because life is good, life is very good.

and i will find a way out of this mess.

now...

i need a smoke to take off the edge

i need to cook so i can remember what i love about being domesticated

i need to do investments and corp finance homework

hello saturday!

one day i will understand what i was thinking, feeling or wanting when i did this to us.

maybe when that day comes i will regret throwing away the best thing that ever happened to me.

but i suppose it would be way too late then, even more so than it already is now

i could spend a long time searching for someone like you and something like what we had.

this grief and guilt is very real.

sorry for taking you on this ride, somehow you're always caught on one.

you deserve another shot at real happiness.

gd luck to us all :)

identity crisis

coz i'm really going through one..its a huge problem.

what happens when you realize that you aren't any of the things you always thought you were?

maybe i'm being a little too melodramatic...

but i am a confused individual indeed.

i need to get back on my feet and remember whats always been important to me.

i wanna talk to my mommy :(

i'm so sorry.

my sky just fell :(